The one who clung to the past

Welcome to “Almost No Filter”, the podcast where I share my almost-forty-something chronicles, between life reflections, daily struggles and small realizations. Here, we talk about everything that is part of our journey: the ups, the downs, the doubts, and even the moments when we feel like we've got it all wrong. The goal? To be as honest as possible with ourselves and with you, without filter or pretension. Because we're all a bit in the same boat, trying to understand what makes us move forward, or sometimes what makes us go round in circles. So, relax and let yourself be carried away. Let's go!

There are times in life when we find ourselves looking back, getting lost in "what if..." As if, by holding onto the past, we could somehow control it. We cling to these memories as if, somehow, we could rewrite history.

“If I had done that differently, if I had said those words, if I hadn’t acted that way… what if…?”

We cling to these thoughts, we get bogged down in them, believing they still have power over us. We believe that by constantly revisiting our mistakes and failures, we can repair what can no longer be repaired. But then, we forget that the past cannot be changed, that it is frozen in time.

So why continue to cling to it? Perhaps because it's easier to stay in familiar stories than to face the uncertainty of the future. We prefer to lose ourselves in what we know rather than face what is still unknown. The past, with its landmarks, reassures us. We know it by heart, while the future scares us.

But at what cost?

Every time we cling to the past, we prevent our present from fully unfolding. It's as if we're glued to the rearview mirror, always looking back, but without seeing what's happening in front of us. We forget to live here, now. We forget that the present moment is a gift and that it only lasts a few moments. Every minute spent lost in regret is a minute we'll never relive.

And yet, sometimes we still hold on because we're afraid to let go.

We fear that everything we've experienced will lose its value if we stop constantly remembering it. But remembering has nothing to do with anchoring. What's valuable is the lessons we learn from it, not the pain we dwell on.

Imagine if we spent as much time thinking about what we could still accomplish as we did looking at what was already behind us. The past is a chapter; it doesn't define the entire book.

So, what are we waiting for to turn the page?

Perhaps letting go doesn't mean forgetting, but rather accepting. Accepting that what we've experienced is part of us, but it doesn't define us forever.

We all have stories, wounds, regrets. But by continuing to hold on to them, we're giving them no chance to heal.

And in this circle of nostalgia and regret, we forget that there's a whole future to explore. We forget that, even if we've lost some things, others await us. Dreams, opportunities. It's by taking our eyes off the rearview mirror that we begin to appreciate the landscape unfolding before us.

So, what if we started letting go? Making a little space for the present, even if it's just a small corner, where we could breathe and let our dreams grow? It's not regrets that will keep us moving forward, but the audacity to believe that there are still pages to write.

And in the end, it's the moment we choose to move forward that makes all the difference.